The only way to get on with something is probably to go through it once more. I did it, went through every bit of the past and deleted them. That's the way to welcome new things isn't it?

It's been a week. I've been thinking if I made the right move to fight that night. My mind has been saying 'look, if you've not gotten yourself into this, you wouldn't be worrying right now' I've said no commitments for now, I'll wait. But why is there a sense of insecurity? I've told you not to doubt me, but why am I the one doubting now? I know settling down isn't easy but somehow not hearing from you make me feel like I'm really not on the priority list at all. Am I really precious to you? Do I cross your mind while you're there?

You said the three words, I told you I won't say that back yet. Did u mean those words? They really did warm my heart. I've not heard someone say them to me in a while. Those tight hugs, what did they mean to you?

What did I got myself into? That's a question that's been on my mind ever since the first day of 2014. Was it really my fault? Did I really do something so wrong to deserve this? I was really unwilling to leave. We had a wonderful night, more than what I could ask for, it wasn't supposed to end this way. I'm at the brink. Almost not able to stand this anymore. But I don't want to appear needy or clingy, I don't want to push you away. What happened to not going to let me go? What happened to that wish you wished for? Is this all a joke, if it is, it's enough, this guilt trip has been long enough. Please end this joke... I feel every minute ticking away.